The days have been flying by this spring. It took a friendly reminder to let me know I hadn’t blogged for quite a while. I haven’t been lazy, but rather quite busy. This is the season of color in the Sandhills. The grass that was dormant with a dirt brown hue seemed to turn bright green overnight. The dogwoods are pristine white and the azaleas are like a painter’s palette of scarlet red, deep pink, lavender, and shining white. This colorful transformation reminds me of the scene from the Wizard of Oz when Dorothy opens the door of her crashed farm house and the black and white picture turns into a memorable, panoramic, technicolor scene.

Surrounded by all the color is so special, but what really amazes me is the growth of the crocus emerging from the pine straw and the buds springing from the pruned Crepe Myrtles. I remember digging shallow holes and dropping the bulbs in the red clay. I was assured they would grow in the spring, but I was more than skeptical. I was even more concerned about my first attempt to prune the Crepe Myrtles. Despite the expert advice I received and the affirmation that I had pruned them correctly in January; I was not optimistic growth would occur in the spring. But it has.

This is probably old hat, ho hum, and “whatever” for those of you who are used to planting, growing, and experiencing annual and perennial plant growth in your yards and gardens. This is all new to me. New and very exciting.

Not only am I in my own yard a great deal of time, but my job affords me the pleasure of spending a majority of the time outdoors as well. Without a doubt a real perk of my new profession. There is one more thing that has caught my attention beyond the colors and the new growth of spring. The sounds of spring. In the mornings and early evenings I do all I can to find a few minutes to be alone. Escaping to the solitude of my own thoughts, whether on the porch swing, sitting on the dock, or somewhere else, I listen to the sounds of the day or night. It may be the breeze through the pines, birds talking to one another, or frogs calling out as the sun dips gracefully from the horizon. Simple? Yes. Relaxing? Definitely. Therapeutic? Most certainly. It gives me a small sense of what Thoreau must have felt on Walden Pond.

It’s a fast-paced world, but it doesn’t always have to be. If you force yourself to take the time to notice the colors, the buds, and the sounds that surround you it will make a difference in your life. It will slow you down and cause you to refresh and rejuvenate your mind. It will put things into perspective.

So often we get caught up in the day-to-day chaos that we call life. It’s not easy to do, but if you can escape that bedlam and trade it in for five to fifteen minutes of solitude, it could possibly be the most important time you spend all day. Look, listen and experience the magic that you can only see and hear if you take the time to do so. And if you don’t think you have time to do this because your to-do list is too long, remember: “There is no present like the time.”

I recall with a smile, my good friend Mike telling me a parable about Mickey Mantle; the late Yankee Hall of Famer. Mickey would have a fantastic game, then would call back to Oklahoma, to share his excitement and desire for a pat on the back from his dad. His dad would congratulate Mickey on his hits or home runs, but then close the call by saying; “Remember Mickey, good enough is neither.” And the next day Mickey would play harder knowing good was not enough for his dad. We all can’t be Mickey Mantle. I learned that a long time ago.

I’ve been doing a great deal of thinking about mediocrity and being good enough lately. I regular self-assess and ask if I’m stretching myself to be better or just settling for mediocrity. Maybe mediocre is too strong. Maybe average is a better word. Most people think they are better than average. I’ve never sat down with anyone in a merit review session and had them tell me they were average. Usually they’re surprised if they aren’t considered the best, hardest working, employee on the team. Helping them understand how they can improve is both a challenge and a joy.

I’ve always tried to surround myself with people who strive for greatness. People who are charismatic, witty, clever, hard-working and fun to be around. Most of all, though, I want to be around someone I can trust. It’s so fulfilling when you can share with someone, believe in someone and know their word is bond.

As the years have gone by, I’ve run into people and worked with others, who wanted you to believe they were something they really were not. Frankly, I think the internet has brought on that mentality. You can hide behind your words…for a while. Unless, of course, you’re on LinkedIn, Facebook or some other revealing social media vehicle. But even those afford you the opportunity to somewhat pretend. This feeling of wanting to be something more than you actually are can and does cause challenges, issues, and problems for many people. People in all walks of life. Whether you’re working at a bank, a bakery, a deck hand on a ship or a network news anchor, you can fall into this trap. You want to impress, feel better about yourself, or be the center of attention…if only for a short while. The story you spin, the tale you tell, it’s all fine till someone finds out the facts don’t add up.
It’s at that point the “Theory of Holes” should be implemented. The person who started the tale must stop digging. It only makes it worse. As my grandma always told me; “Never lie. When you tell the truth you never have to remember what you said.”

Once you catch a person telling an untruth it’s easy to get them to tell another and another to cover the first untruth. Pretty soon that vortex takes over and they spiral deeper and deeper until they have to admit the first falsehood. Just ask Pete Rose.

Brian Williams had been the face of NBC. He is charismatic, witty, clever, hard-working and from what others at NBC have said, fun to be around. He is also a fabulous story teller. If you’ve ever heard him speak, you probably agree. His problem was he wanted to be more than the face of NBC. I’m not sure what he wanted, but he wanted more than that. When the facts behind a twelve year old story came out, he had a chance to correct the facts and apologize. He failed at both of those opportunities and the “Theory of Holes” took over. Now he has lost the trust millions put into him. As you know, it takes a lifetime to build trust and only seconds to lose it. Once gone, it can be nearly impossible to earn again. A tough life lesson to learn for anyone.

As I continue to reflect on my own gifts and talents, this event has provided me a new perspective. I love to tell stories. But I will always let my audience know when I am stretching the truth. I will continue to strive to be better, but accept who I am. When I meet someone new I won’t pretend to be something or someone I’m not. Hopefully they will be curious and courageous enough to trust me. It’s always a little risky to put yourself out there, but I’ve found more times than not its well worth the risk.

Almost twenty years ago I received a laminated copy of Bill Waterson’s last edition of the Calvin and Hobbes comic strip. It was given to me by a man who was retiring and who, unbeknown to him, was a mentor to me. For those of you who may not be familiar with a comic strip that ended twenty years ago, Calvin and Hobbes was about a six year old boy (Calvin) and his stuffed pet tiger (Hobbes). The last edition was Mr. Waterson saying good-bye to his readers after 10 years and 3,150 installments. It was created on December 31, 1995. Calvin and Hobbes were outdoors in brand new snow with Calvin’s sled. You can pull up the link for the actual comic, but the dialogue went like this…..

Calvin – “Wow, it really snowed last night! Isn’t it wonderful?”
Hobbes – “Everything familiar has disappeared! The world looks brand-new!”
Calvin – “A new year, a fresh clean start!”
Hobbes – “It’s like having a big white sheet of paper to draw on!”
Calvin – “A day full of possibilities!”
Calvin – “It’s a magical world, Hobbes ol’ buddy…Let’s go exploring!”

As they head down the hill riding tandem on Calvin’s sled, I truly believe Mr. Waterson captured the essence of what a new year feels like. A clean slate, a fresh start, new opportunities and adventures. A new year does that automatically – I guess. But, at the same time, we don’t have to wait for a new year to feel this way.
Remember the quote that became so popular many years ago? “Today is the first day of the rest of your life.” It was repeated so often it actually became cliché. Nevertheless, it’s still true. Each day the prospects to make a difference stand before us. We have the opportunity to take calculated risks, dare to be different, reach out to old friends, and connect with new people, places and things. We might educate ourselves to learn new skills. Or we may chose to get out of our comfort zones and not be afraid to fail. The possibilities truly are endless.
Whether it’s the beginning of a new year or the start of a new day, the possibilities are out there. What is the key to unlock the possibilities? What is the one constant remaining?

It’s up to you to do the exploring.

Calvin was right – it is a magical world. But I believe it is up to you to make the magic happen.

I doubt my retiring mentor had any idea I would be referring to his gift 19 years later, in my Blog. I want him to know that I treasure the sentiment and the lesson it continues to teach me. I’ve carried the laminated sheet with me in my backpack when I traveled or at my desk at work. It now sits in a prominent location at home. On the back of the page he wrote three words that have also stuck with me – “Make good tracks.” I consider those three words a request and a mantra worth living.

I request the same to you for each day of 2015…..Make Good Tracks!

I remember receiving quite a few snow globes as a child. Seems like they’ve been a holiday staple for years. Many movies and television shows have used snow globes as props. Both Citizen Kane and It’s a Wonderful Life had snow globes in the beginning of their stories. I also recall the medical show St. Elsewhere using a snow globe. This time, it was one of the last scenes of the series and left the viewer to believe every episode of the seven year run was really just in the mind of an autistic young boy named Tommy. It was creative, controversial and poignant.

When the cold winds begin to blow and flurries fill the air, I often reminisce about the snow globe. Lately, those thoughts have taken me down another path. I’ve been thinking a great deal about what’s outside of the snow globe. Seems to me we often get hung up, bogged down, or trapped in our own little snow globe. It’s a vital, important and secure place to be….so we think. I mean, after all, there are bills to pay, and work to be done, and the kids need new shoes. The Elf on the Shelf isn’t going to go buy packages, or address and mail Christmas cards.

At the same time it is SO refreshing, exhilarating, and sometimes scary, when I dare to step out of my own safe world.

I am and always will be a dreamer. It’s fun for me to lay in bed and dream of all kinds of things. Imagining what might and could be in another place or time. Not second guessing – just dreaming. The same is true for those of us who stay in our own snow globe world. What would happen if we broke free, took a calculated risk or chance and saw what was beyond our usual horizon?

I was talking to a co-worker the other day. He’s 92. He was telling me a story that happened in April, 1962. He was recalling in vivid detail, the people and places as if it were last week, not 52+ years ago. I kept asking more questions and was both captivated and fascinated with this adventure and his life. It became obvious to me he has never been one to stick around in his snow globe for very long.

That night, as I drifted off to sleep, I couldn’t help but wonder if that zest and zeal for adventure has been a catalyst for his long life. And I had to ask myself, if I had that same enthusiasm and attitude would I too enjoy a wonderful life outside my own little world. Maybe we all need to pause as the flurries swirl around our heads and think what life would be like outside our snow globes.

Wishing you all a safe, magical and joyous holiday in whatever way you chose to celebrate the season.

I was once sitting in a class at the University of Pennsylvania when Dr. Charles Dwyer said:

“Words, the fragile vessels of our meanings, easily lose their way in the channels of others’ minds.”

Dr. Dwyer then provided numerous examples, most quite humorous, of words and phrases they meant one thing and said another.

Mark Twain has an appropriate quote about words I enjoy…

“The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.”

The late Chris Farley had a recurring skit on Saturday Night Live where he would be a host/interviewer of famous people and he could barely get the words out of his mouth. When he finally did ask his questions, he would belittle himself, pull his hair and say, “I’m such an idiot.”

I’ve often felt just like that….

Saying the right thing at the right time can be a frustrating struggle. I used to sit in meetings filled with some important people and some people who thought they were important. You know the kind of meeting I’m talking about. One where people are jockeying for the floor, to illustrate their leadership skills and communication capabilities.

I would wait for just the right time to provide my insights. I’d make notes on the paper in front of me, to be sure I captured the essence of the conversation. I wanted to include what had already been shared so I could come off as inclusive and thoughtful. I’d mull over the words in my head and once there was a split second of silence in the room, I’d jump into the conversation.

Ninety-five percent of the time, what I wanted to say, what I had practiced in my mind, was different, not nearly as good, and lacked the power  I desired to convey. Where I sought to capture lightning in a bottle, I instead released a lightning bug. Finding the right word or words is still something I work on to this day.

Whether it’s talking to a friend, co-worker, relative or total stranger, finding the right words, at the right time, is a perpetual challenge for me. Maybe it is for you as well.

Over the years I’ve picked up some methods and tidbits that have helped me become more comfortable with the sharing my thoughts aloud.

• I listen carefully. Multi-tasking my own thoughts while others are speaking can often confuse what I want to say.
• Taking notes. This helps me to be sure I won’t forget a key message point.
• Simplify. Thoreau was right. Keep your words and phrases simple and in lay terms. Business Jargon and acronyms may indicate you know what you’re talking about, but many members of your audience will appreciate basic expressions.
• Don’t go for the grand slam. Trying to encapsulate everything everyone else has said in your own points is usually biting off more than you can chew. You can’t hit a grand slam if there is no one on base. Make your point or points and be happy with a single or a double. If the body language in the room is affirming your points, you can always enter into the conversation again and add to what you have said.
• Follow-Up your remarks with clarifying questions. “Does that make sense?” “Do you see what I mean?” Both are simple questions that allow the listener to agree or ask additional questions for clarity and understanding.

It’s never easy to express yourself off-the-cuff or impromptu. It’s a gift few people possess. But it’s a skill that can be learned with practice and humility. Keep in mind no one knows all the answers. Saying what you’re thinking is usually the first step toward finding a workable solution. Knowing how to say, what you want to say, when you want to say it puts one on the path to communication enlightenment.

It seems to me the leaves are changing colors earlier this year.  Probably just my imagination, but I think the early September chill has activated the sequence like the crank in the game of Mouse Trap.  That sequence of gorgeous colors, followed by falling leaves, (usually expedited by a hard cold rain) then the laborious clean-up signals the end of the tree growing season.   The grass will go dormant and usually turns brown.  The trees will look barren and stoic like a department store manikin without clothing.  Then along about March or April when the buds begin to appear along the tree branches a fascinating reveal takes place.  The trees have grown.  With older trees you must really observe closely to notice, but on a younger tree it is very obvious.   I marvel and wonder how that growth took place through the dead of winter.  But it does.  The tree just kept growing despite the elements.

I recently took on a new job.  I’m one of the youngest members of the team.  And obviously the least experienced.  What a golden opportunity to learn and grow and develop.  I’ve been introduced to a number of team members who have been in their roles any where from a year to 26 years.  Each one of them brings  different perspective, unique background and special knowledge.  They possess unbelievable business and life experiences as well. Their personalities are as colorful as an October maple tree.  Now it is up to me to  listen and be educated.  Not only for my role on the team, but for what each have garnered on their respective life paths.

As a new member of the team, I feel like that tree in December, void of leaves and lacking in value. But if I quietly listen, I’m optimistic, come spring, I will be budding with new knowledge for the job and more importantly new tips for life that will allow me to continue to grow.

Don’t ever stop growing…..

“Well it’s been quite a summer, rent-a-cars and westbound trains.”  That excerpt from Jimmy Buffett’s “Come Monday” really resonates with me.  It always has.  Especially this summer. The song, about a guy who longs to be with the one he loves, is kept apart because of his hectic vagabond summer tour out west.  He desperately wants to travel the road that will take him back to her.

I too have had a busy summer.  I’ve been as far east as North Carolina and as far west as Colorado.  I retired from one job and had the good fortune of being hired into another.  Many would say I’m “Living the Dream.”

But always in life, challenges surface, like the whack-a-mole at the county fair.  Always something popping up to make sure you don’t feel too comfortable or set in your ways.  It’s at those times, when I try my best to  remember the most difficult roads we  travel must be taken with positive steps.  Sometimes we even have to take a step back, to get a better view of the horizon and a full picture of the road ahead.

More than 38 years ago, I literally had a long road ahead of me.  I didn’t have the vision or the maturity to know how to walk that road.  But I had A LOT of help along the way.  This summer, I was able to recount that journey in the book, The Road to Normal.

It took me many re-writes, edits and enormous amounts of encouragement from my son and others to complete this book.  If you go back to the  home page and click on Jewels in Your Crown – Mining the Treasures Within the link will take you to a site for The Road to Normal.

If you happen to be on the road out east, September 20,  I’d encourage you to stop by one of the finest independent book stores in the United States  – The Country Bookshop at 140 NW Broad Street in Southern Pines, North Carolina.  I’ll be there to visit and sign copies of The Road to Normal.

Hope to see y’all there.

As a youngster, summer was always the most exciting time of the year for me.  So many things to do; baseball, swimming, fishing golfing, trips to St. Louis to watch the Cardinals, afternoons at the local park to play knock-hockey or caroms, and of course, camping out, usually in the back yard.

There were always benchmarks to my summers marked often by big picnics. Memorial Day weekend kicked off the summer and we’d listen to the Indianapolis 500 on the transistor radio.  The 4th of July was the halfway point; celebrated with a huge parade and heart pounding fireworks.  The county fair and the state fair signaled summer was coming to an end.  The tastes and smells  of taffy, cotton candy, corn on the cob and the pungent aroma of the carnies working the midway will forever be etched in my senses.

It all came and went way too fast.  By the time Jerry Lewis did his annual MDA Telethon, I was already back to school. I longed for the “Endless Summer” the Beach Boys sang about 40 years ago.  When I began my career and moved around the country to places like Texas or Alabama I found summers did last longer; or so it seemed.  You see, I equated summer with the temperature and the color of the leaves.  It stayed warm and green down south a good bit longer and that really helped my state-of-mind.

When my work brought me back to the Midwest I decided it was up to me to keep that endless summer state-of-mind. I developed reasons for staying outdoors later into the year.  I played golf with two gloves on, I raked my own leaves and when I hit my middle 40’s I began ice fishing in Northern Wisconsin, with my brother.

It wasn’t just being outside that helped me transform my mindset, it was how I approached my day. When you’re young, every day of summer has adventurous possibilities.  As I grew older, and the summer days flew by faster, I was determined not to let the calendar get in the way of my happiness.  Finding adventure, completing a project, or relishing a moment wasn’t dictated by the season,  but by me.

I smiled when I saw Labor Day weekend was at the earliest possible time this year. What used to signal the end of summer, is just another reason for a cookout for me now.  Summer doesn’t have to only be three months.  Make it a state-of-mind, not a season.

I’ve never much cared for yard work. It’s often tedious and boring and invariably coupled with traditional steamy Illinois heat and humidity.   I’ve had a hesitancy to prune the bushes and the trees for fear of  messing up the look of them.

A few years ago we were fortunate to find a little cottage on a lake in the Sandhills of North Carolina. It sits on just about an acre of property.  If you sit on the back screened-in porch you can view a couple dozen pine trees, some azalea bushes and the lake.  If you’re perched on a rocker on the front porch you gaze upon, dogwoods,  rhododendrons, hydrangeas, crepe myrtles,  and an assortment of pines and ornamental plants.

When we moved in, you couldn’t see either the lake in the back or the cul-de-sac in the front, because of the density of the bushes and trees.  If you wanted privacy, this was the place for you.  I like my privacy and my solitude, but I learned these trees and bushes need room to grow. When a red tip grows into a pine or a crepe myrtle invades the space of an azalea bush, both suffer.

So, for the last several years, I’ve learned how to prune, how to use a lopper and a chainsaw and how to tell when a branch is really dead.  My landscape friend Jeff often reminds me, you can’t hurt anything.  He proved it by cutting the hydrangeas down to the ground and the crepe myrtles down to knuckles.  Before the year had passed they were not only blooming but thriving with a renewed spirit and freshness.

This isn’t news for those of you who are into horticulture, but to a guy like me who didn’t know a lopper from a trowel, it’s inspiring.   It also makes me think about our own lives and existence.  Do we go through life with the same mundane attitude?  Not really growing, but rather stagnating and letting circumstances smother, overwhelm or stifle our own growth and results.  Or do we decide it’s up to us to change, adapt, refresh, and reshape.  Is your life’s strategy working, or is it time to prune in order to grow?  If you feel like you’re being smothered, overwhelmed or overshadowed, maybe it’s time to take on a new strategy to prune back the old to allow the new to flourish.

Jeff is right;  You really can’t hurt anything by trying…..good luck!

The first entry in the Oxford dictionary for the word “Retirement” is this: “The action or fact of leaving one’s job and ceasing to work.” I certainly concur with the first half of that definition, however I doubt if many people “cease to work” while in the phase of life called “retirement.” Whether it’s around their home or in the public or private sector, very few people work until retirement age and then do nothing. It’s usually not in their DNA.

It’s quite true I have left my current job. I was with my employer for 35 years in a variety of different locations and roles. Now that I have departed to begin new adventures and since I will soon draw a pension from that employer, I am considered retired. The reality right now is I am on vacation. I had accrued enough “PV” to be on vacation from March 1 to August 1.

Frankly, I find it a wonderful spot to be in. People ask me all the time, “How do you like retirement?” I usually say, “it feels like vacation to me.” Indeed I hope it always does. As many people have heard me quote Confucius “If you love your work, you’ll never work a day in your life.” Well, I’m loving vacation and I hope that my new career with Jewels in Your Crown (JiYC) will be just as much fun. You see, I don’t plan to “retire” for a long, long time, but I do hope I can add value on this earth via a new and exciting vehicle.

I imagine many “retirees” feel as I do. They want to continue to add value and make a difference. Let me know what you think.
All my best,
Craig